Lost Without A Trace: Daily Post Prompt

 

SLATE AMAZON PAPERBACK FINAL COVER - frontToday’s Daily Post Prompt –Trace — gives me the perfect opportunity to plug one of my newest inspirational novels: SLATE.  The story of Slate and Vanessa plays out over a second story concerning Vanessa’s brother Ken. A private investigator, Ken traces a young girl from her home in Missouri to the Gulf coast of Florida, but then Ken himself suddenly disappears without a trace. That event causes Vanessa to head to Florida to look for him, and from the day she arrives and meets Slate, her life is changed forever. So is Slate’s.

Inspirational Fiction: Digital or Paperback at Amazon.

HERE’S 2 EXCERPTS:

From Chapter 1:

He hopped out of the metallic-blue corvette convertible, tossing his cigarette down and extinguishing it with his boot, then set off down the sidewalk toward Katy’s Koffee Korner. He walked with a definite swagger, and it was hard to tell if it was because of or in spite of the almost skin-tight blue jeans that covered his long legs. His light blue sleeveless, knit shirt exposed brown, sinewy arms and hugged a tight stomach before being swallowed up by the leather belted waistline that sported a gold buckle shaped like a pirate ship.

His hair was such a dark brown it looked black in certain light, and although he didn’t wear it long, any activity on his part, or the slightest of breezes, kept throwing one thick lock across his forehead. In spite of the fact that he brushed his hand through it periodically, that one lock just seemed to have a mind of its own.

As he passed a bench on the sidewalk where two older men sat chatting over Styrofoam cups of coffee, one of the men called to him, chuckling.

“Hear you spent the night in the clink again last Friday, Slate.”

The man he’d addressed stopped long enough to grin at him and then wink. “Trying to save on my electric bills, Chet.” Both of the old boys laughed, enjoying the little joke, as they did almost any little bit of conversation throughout the day as they sat on their favorite bench, trying to ease the tedium of their otherwise empty lives.

“Coffee’s especially good this morning,” Chet replied now, holding up his half-empty cup and motioning toward the café behind where he and his friend sat.

“I’m just on my way in to try it,” Slate answered and, giving them a thumbs-up sign, turned in to the doorway and opened the door to the Koffee Korner. …

This morning, though, Hally was on duty, and she always kept an eye out for Slate. She liked to wait on him … and flirt with him. Actually, she liked to flirt with him … and she tolerated having to work as a waitress in order to get the chance to do some serious flirting. Of course she didn’t save all of her attention for Slate. She shared it with several of the other men in town, but Slate was one of her favorites. He had taken her out two different times several months ago, and both times had proved to be the kind of night she liked … the kind that didn’t end until the following morning. …

While he ate, stopping every now and then to say something to one of the other patrons who passed his booth on the way to the restroom or back, Slate glanced over at the woman across from him. She had raised her head now and was sipping her coffee, her eyes closed. Her hair was a warm light brown shade, with just a tinge of highlights from the sun here and there. It barely skimmed her shoulders in soft waves. Her features weren’t classically beautiful, but she was really pleasant to look at. Her complexion was unblemished, and her eyes and eyebrows seemed to be etched in at exactly the right angles to highlight her whole face. Her mouth was rather wide, and her lips looked as if an artist had sculptured them. Yes, all in all, the sight was something he took pleasure in this morning.

He’d evidently taken just a little too much pleasure, because he’d been staring. Suddenly, she looked up and right at him, a question in her large, brown eyes. Almost exactly the color of a copper penny, Slate thought to himself as his attention focused on those eyes. He was caught off guard by the vulnerable look on her face, and instinctively he smiled his most genuine smile at her and then went back to concentrating on his food. A minute later, he heard her conversation with the waitress who had come back to bring her a fresh carafe of coffee.

“Can you give me exact directions from here to the Sandstone Motel?” she asked.

“Sure, Hon. It isn’t hard. I’ll write it down for you and be right back.”

“Thank you,” she answered, smiling and lighting up her face for just a moment, but when the waitress left, she went back to rubbing her temples and then her eyes. She finally leaned her head back against the high divider of her booth and closed her eyes, but Slate, glancing sideways at her, noticed a couple of tears trickling down her cheeks. After a minute more, she took a deep breath and opened her eyes, wiping the tears from her face with her hands, and by that time the waitress was back with her directions.

“Thank you so much,” she said and handed the waitress some bills. “This is for you.”

“Thanks, and you come and see us again, Okay?”

“If I have time,” she said smiling slightly at the retreating waitress, and then she slid out of her seat and stood up. Before she could take a step, she swayed and reached for the back of the booth to regain her balance. She was sitting in the last booth across from him, and no one else had noticed the unusual action. She sat back down on the edge of the booth, holding her head. Slate had learned better than to interfere in someone else’s business, but something about her just seemed so vulnerable that he couldn’t keep from getting up and walking over to her booth.

“Are you all right, Miss?” he asked, resting one hand on the table and leaning towards her. She looked up at him then, her eyes registering her pain.

“Yes,” she answered in almost a whisper. Then she cleared her throat and tried to speak louder. “It’s just this stupid migraine headache. They often make me woozy. Eating should help, but I guess the food just hasn’t had time to get into my system yet. I’ll just sit here another minute. Thanks,” she added, smiling wanly.

Slate sat down in the other side of the booth. “How about another cup of coffee?”

She turned back into the normal sitting position in the booth and nodded her head as he picked up the carafe and poured some into her cup. She began drinking it immediately, and Slate stepped over to his own booth and retrieved his cup, bringing it back with him. He poured fresh coffee for himself and topped hers off again. She smiled at him, her eyes seeming to show a little relief now.

“My sister often has migraine headaches,” he said. “They make her sick for days.”

She nodded her head. “They do some people. Usually, I’m not ill, but I have to be careful when they make me dizzy.” She took a deep breath. “I’m feeling better now. Thank you for your concern, Mr… .?”

“Slate’s fine,” he answered. “I heard you ask the waitress about the Sandstone. Is this your first visit in this area?”

“Yes, and it really isn’t a visit exactly.”

“Oh …?”

“Well … I guess there’s no reason to be secretive about it, so I might as well tell you. Anybody I meet around here just might be able to tell me something that will give me a lead.”

His eyebrows rose. “Are you a private detective?”

She chuckled a little. “No … I’m not, but my brother is. And he was on a case that led him to this area. His last call to his wife a week ago was from the Sandstone, and then he just disappeared.”

“Disappeared?”

She nodded. “None of us has heard from him again, not even the family whose daughter he was trailing. She was a runaway, and only seventeen. They had hired him to find her and bring her home, and he had caught up with her in Lakeland. Then she took a bus to Tampa, then hitched a ride out to this little town and on to the Sandstone Motel. He followed her that far, but we don’t have any idea what happened after that.”

“Have you contacted the police?”

“Oh yes. He’d been calling his wife every day, so after the third day without a call from him, we contacted our own sheriff’s department at home. He’s been in touch with the one here, but they don’t seem to have any leads.” She shrugged. “Not that I have any either, but I just couldn’t sit at home and do nothing when Kendall could be in some kind of serious danger or …” She stopped and swallowed hard. “Or worse,” she finished.

He leaned back in his seat. “Well, the sheriff’s department here is usually pretty thorough. I’ll say that for them at least.”

“I need to go talk to them personally, but I’ve been driving all night, and I want to get a room and shower and rest first. Hopefully I can get rid of the last of this headache.” She looked at him more intently then, taking in his manner of dress and his almost lazy way of leaning back in the booth.

“Please don’t let me keep you,” she said then in a tone he’d have attributed to some socialite addressing a lower-class citizen. “Thanks for your concern, but I can take care of myself from here,” she added, lifting her chin a little higher than normal, her voice edged with a bit of frost. Slate felt that he’d been dismissed. Well, so much for trying to help. How many times did he need to learn to mind his own business before he’d pay attention?

He rose from his seat and gave a sketchy salute. “Yes, M’am,” he said, a little frosty himself. He walked to the front and paid his bill. …

On his way down the highway twenty minutes later, headed back to the dock, he was in a foul mood. Most of the supplies he needed were back-ordered, and he was going to be in a bind. He was trying to force himself to stop worrying about it when he spotted what looked like Vanessa’s car up ahead sitting on the side of the road. He slowed as he passed, and recognizing her, he pulled over just in front of her. Part of his mind was telling him to stay out of her business and save himself another snubbing. But the other part was responding to the code he’d lived by all his life about helping anybody that was down. He got out now and walked back to her driver’s side, leaning down to see in the window. “Problems?”

“Yes … I don’t have any idea what’s wrong. A few minutes ago it just sputtered and then died. I barely got it off the road.”

“Are you out of gas?”

She looked daggers at him. “I’m not an idiot! I know a car has to have gas to run. There’s plenty of gas!”

Whew, he thought. I wish I didn’t have enough conscience to bother me if I just left her here. “Well … pull your hood release, and I’ll take a look.”

“Do you know anything about cars?”

He chuckled as he walked toward the front of the car. “No … I just get my kicks stopping by stranded motorists and asking to play under the hood of their cars.”

Vanessa got out and walked closer to him. “You don’t have to be sarcastic. A lot of men don’t know how to repair cars. I was just asking.”

“Well, I don’t know everything about ‘em; that’s for sure. But since I have to keep my boat engines in good running order, I can usually do a thing or two about car engines as well.”

“You have boats?”

He glanced up momentarily. “A few.” Vanessa recognized by his tone of voice that the conversation was at an end for the time being, so she remained quiet.

He checked a couple possible causes of the problem, but came up short of a solution. He was pretty sure he knew what was wrong, but didn’t have the equipment to fix it. “I’m sorry, but I don’t have the equipment necessary to fix it out here. We’ll have to get you towed in.” He stepped back and looked at her license plate again. “I’m guessing your name is Vanessa. Am I right?” he asked, grinning.

She seemed a little affronted that he’d asked, but she did answer him. “Yes … Vanessa Hayes.”

“Well, Vanessa Hayes, I can give you a lift to the Sandstone.”

He saw the briefest flash of fear in her eyes before she answered. “Oh … oh well … I don’t want to trouble you Mr. uh …”

“Slate’s good enough.”

“But don’t you have a last name?”

He looked straight at her, his blue eyes piercing hers, but he stood silent for another moment before he spoke again. “I’ll call for a tow truck.”

“I have a cell phone,” she said and started to turn back to the car.

“Never mind, I’ve got it,” he answered, already punching in some numbers. “I’ve given these guys a lot of business, so I think I can talk them into getting to you today.”

“I really don’t want to put you to this trouble, Mr. uh …”

He was talking to the man on the other end of the phone now, but he gave her an exasperated look. When he had finished the call, he snapped his phone shut and clipped it back onto his belt. “They said they’ll try to get here in a couple of hours.”

“Oh … well … I’ll just wait then.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” He slammed down the hood. “There’s no point in you’re waiting out here two hours. By then it will be the hottest part of the day. Let’s get your luggage, and I’ll take you to your motel.”

Vanessa stepped back. “No … no, thank you, Mr. uh …”

“Slate!”

“Mr. Slate, thank you for your offer of a ride, but I’m going to stay here with my car.”

“That isn’t necessary. I told them I’d be by their place to check on it this evening, so you can be sure they’ll take good care of it.”

“Do you have that much influence?” she asked, her eyes widening with her obvious surprise. “I would have thought that someone like you wouldn’t …” She stopped in mid-sentence, realizing that what she had started to say would sound pretty rude.

He raised one eyebrow. “You mean you thought that someone like me wouldn’t have any good influence anywhere, right?”

“Well, it was a logical mistake,” she excused herself, in reality hating herself for such a stupid and unkind blunder. Who was she to judge this man by his outward appearance and manner? She could tell she’d made him angry.

“Just get in my car. I’ll get your bags.”

She pulled herself up to her full five and a half feet and stepped in front of her car door. Then she held out her hand to him as if to shake hands. He just looked at her for moment and then extended his hand too, not sure what a handshake right now meant. Vanessa spoke again. “Thank you for stopping, Mr. Slate, but you can be on your way now. I prefer not to ride with you.”

He could feel that she had tried to withdraw her hand after the briefest of contacts, but he had deliberately held on for several more seconds. He realized it discomfited her, but he felt she deserved it for the way she was acting. As soon as he released her hand, she wiped it down the side of her slacks as if to clean something off.

Slate stepped back a step and folded his arms across his chest, staring at her and squinting a little against the sun. “The uppity Miss Priss. Too good to ride with the likes of me. Well … suit yourself, Miss Priss. Sit out here and bake in this sun if you want to, but don’t be surprised if that tow truck doesn’t show up for four or five hours.”

“But you said they told you two!”

He laughed. “They did, and I knew that meant that they’d at least get to it before nightfall. That’s a lot around here, Miss Priss, and you’d best be thankful for that much.”

“Don’t call me that!”

“What?”

“Miss Priss!”

He chuckled. “You’re the prissiest little fox I’ve seen around here in a lifetime, Honey. The name suites you to a ‘T.’” He turned and started back to his car then. Let the prudish snob sit out here by herself, he thought as he reached to open his car door. But then he looked up at her. She was rubbing her temples again, and he remembered that she was suffering with a migraine. He remembered again how his sister wasn’t fit to live with when she had one because they affected her so badly.

He let out a heavy sigh and started back toward Vanessa. “Look,” he said as he got within a couple feet, “I’ll call the sheriff’s office. They know me. I give them a lot of business too. You can talk to the officer on duty, and I’ll tell them that I’m taking you to the Sandstone. That way, you know I’ll not abduct you into some isolated field and rape and kill you. How’s that?”

“Thank you,” she said in what was almost a whisper now. Then she turned and opened her door. “I’ll get the keys and open the trunk.”

From Chapter 4:

About twelve miles down the highway from the Sandstone Motel, a poorly paved road turned West and wound several miles out into the countryside. A half dozen old houses dotted the area, each one at least two or three miles away from its neighbor in any direction. But a little over five miles out on the paved road, there was a gravel turnoff, almost hidden by overgrown bushes, that led another four miles out to a house that sat on an inlet with its own worn out boat dock.

Inside that house, in an empty back bedroom, two people sat on the floor, their backs propped against the wall, their hands and feet tied securely enough to make sure they couldn’t leave their accommodations at will. The man was tall and muscular, with golden brown hair that matched that of his younger sister so much that people often thought they were twins. He wore thin, gold-rimmed glasses, and ordinarily made a handsome picture to most observers. Right now, though, his face was marred by an ugly scratch and a couple of bruises, and his clothes were wrinkled and stained.

His companion was a young girl with stringy, blond hair … which at one time had probably been thick and shiny enough to attract a second and third look from most men. Right now, she was sitting beside him, sick with fear and wishing she’d never seen most of the men she’d ever known in her seventeen years. The one exception to that wish was her companion in this make-shift prison.

The only reason he was here at all was because he had tried to come to her rescue when she had tried to get away from what had turned out to be a group of drug dealers, and had been losing the battle for her freedom. He hadn’t succeeded in his attempt to help her. And now they were both facing whatever unknown horrors were being planned for them by the thugs that had tied them up while they carried out their own ugly business.

Kendall Hayes leaned his head back against the wall, his eyes closed, and prayed for the umpteenth time that day … as he had done for the last six days sitting in this room. The one drug dealer of the bunch who interacted with him and Sarah, his cell-mate, was Gary – Sarah’s boyfriend until his true identity and occupation had come to light. Gary came in twice a day with food and water, and led them away, one at a time, to the bathroom, standing guard just outside the door. That was the only precaution necessary, since the bathroom didn’t have even one window, and there was certainly no chance of escape from that cubbyhole. If they made enough fuss, he came and escorted one of them to the bathroom at other times, but it was a chore to convince him he needed to heed their urgency.

After the first four days of incarceration, Sarah had talked Gary into allowing her and Kendall a change of clothes from the suitcases they’d had with them. But other than those concessions, the plight of the inhabitants of this back bedroom seemed to be of no interest to anybody else on the premises.

“You prayin’ again?” Sarah asked her companion now as she saw he had his eyes closed and his lips moving.

He opened his eyes and smiled at her slightly. “Yeah … gotta stay at it.”

“You really believe your God’s gonna get us outta here?”

He sighed. “You ask me that every day, Sarah. And the answer is still the same. Yes … I really believe that.”

Tears welled up in the girl’s eyes, as they had several times during the last several days. “I sure wish I could believe.”

She had said that at least a dozen times in the days they’d shared this room, and Kendall had always given her the same answer. “You can, Sarah. Just ask Jesus to make Himself real to you, and you’ll be able to believe.” She hadn’t been able to bring herself to do that yet, but Kendall could tell she was closer than she had been the first couple of days. He closed his eyes again now.

“Please, Lord Jesus,” he whispered just loud enough for the girl to hear him too, “please make Yourself real to Sarah. She can’t ask You for herself, Lord, so I’m asking for her. Just help her a little more, Lord to recognize that You’re here and that You love her and want to help her. And please, Lord … send your angels to open up this prison and lead both of us out of here. I’m trusting you, Lord. I’m trusting you with all the faith I have.”

He’d prayed those same words, or some very similar, so many times his rational mind told him that it was no use to pray them again. But he had belonged to Jesus Christ for most of his life, and he’d always found Jesus faithful in times of trouble. Kendall was determined even now that he would not give up his faith in God’s love and delivering power.

Look Out for the Arrows!

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QUIVER COVER FOR AMAZON - front

YAY!!!!! Finally!
A QUIVER FULL OF ARROWS is finally available in paperback at Amazon.

An author is by her books the way a mother is by her children: she never really has favorites. However, if I were forced to choose only one of my 12 novels as a favorite, I think it would have to be A QUIVER FULL OF ARROWS. It isn’t the most important novel I’ve written, and it hasn’t sold as well as the “Smoky Mountain Series” books, but it has a charm that no other book has.

Even though I wrote the story — and have read it multiple times to edit, correct, and tweak it — I can honestly say I still enjoy it immensely every time I read it. I laugh; I cry; I feel happy; I feel poignant. And I always come to the words “The End” with a huge grin on my face. I hope all my readers do as well.

You can have that experience too. Check out the synopsis and purchase your copy of A QUIVER FULL OF ARROWS for $7.99 at Amazon now.

 

 

~~~

Releasing the Creative Writer in You – Lesson 8

To access other lessons in this series, click on “Creative Writing Class” in the navigation bar and scroll through to find the lessons you need.

releasing-the-creative-writer-in-you-coverLESSON 8: EDITING – MAKING SURE WE’VE SAID IT IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE.
(What do we look for?  How do we fix it?)

1. GENERAL MANUSCRIPT FORM –  For both fiction and non-fiction:

If your material is published in book form, you will automatically have a title page, and a copyright page on the back of the title page. All of your identifying data for the book, for you, and for the publisher will go there. But if you are not to that point yet, and you’re preparing a manuscript to send to an agent or a publisher, there are some basic rules you want to follow. They are mostly just good sense and thoughtfulness, but sometimes people who are genuinely talented in creating stories have never had much training in laying out their material. So this section is primarily for those people.

Use regular letter size paper, and, in general, it’s best to leave the pages loose. Staples can sometimes get in the way when an editor reads. It’s often good to use a title page as your first page, and you’ll want to put the title, your name, and the copyright information on that page. Also, be sure to check the submission guidelines from whatever company you’re submitting to, in case they want other information as well. It’s a good idea to also include the word count on that title page as well.

On the first page of the actual text — if you have a short story — repeat the main title at the top and go down at least 3 or 4 lines (more if you like) before beginning the story. If you’re submitting a novel, then you don’t need to repeat the title at the top of that page; the Chapter number is sufficient.

Double-space every single line of the paper so that the editor can write between all the lines. (And even if you’re writing the final draft for yourself, having those blank spaces lets you do a lot of editing and re-writing where it can be easily read.)

Indent the first sentence of every paragraph at least 5 spaces to the right.

Leave at least a 1-inch margin on top, bottom, and both sides. (Always remember that white space is your friend.)

Use 12pt. Or 13pt. font for text of the story at all times. (Anything else is too small for comfortable reading, and anything larger causes your manuscript to be too bulky.)

In the top left corner of each consecutive page, put your last name and the title of the story. Put page numbers in right-hand corner.

All of these rules may seem unimportant, but you want to remember that all of those editors and agents you’re sending to generally have so many hundreds of manuscripts pouring in weekly that they cannot possibly read them all. As a result, they will just naturally gravitate to the manuscripts that are neat, easy to read, and pleasing to the eye.


2. GRAMMAR AND WORD CHOICE:

Run-On Sentences
One of the most common errors in the manuscripts I see is the run-on sentence. That problem develops when a writer tries to tie two complete thoughts together with just a comma between them. It has become so common in today’s society that I see it even in published books. But it is a serious mistake and often leads to confusion for the reader.  I have listed several examples of run-on sentences below along with a couple possibilities for fixing the problem.  The fix is generally just a matter of replacing incorrect commas with periods or semi-colons, which tell the reader that one thought is complete and another thought is beginning. When those two thoughts are very closely related, the semi-colon is an acceptable punctuation. Otherwise, use a period.

EXAMPLES:

I have this problem, well, more like a gift, no on second thought it’s a curse.

Correction: I have this problem, well, more like a gift; no, on second thought, it’s a curse.

Or: I have this problem, well, more like a gift. No, on second thought, it’s a curse.

Well, you won’t have any trouble with it, it was easy.

Correction: Well, you won’t have any trouble with it; it was easy.

Or: Well, you won’t have any trouble with it. It was easy.

Or: Well, you won’t have any trouble with it because it was easy.

She just stared at me, all of them did.

Correction: She just stared at me; all of them did.

Or: She just stared at me. All of them did.

Or: She just stared at me, as all of them did.


COMPUTER WITH TONGUE OUTActive Voice vs. Passive Voice Verbs

Every year at Christmas, hundreds of lights had been strung throughout the property, and each Christmas Eve carols were sung by the townspeople who gathered there.

Correction: Every year at Christmas, the owners strung hundreds of lights throughout the property, and each Christmas Eve, the townspeople gathered there and sang carols.

A wonderful time was had by all.

Correction: Every one had a wonderful time.

Papers had been drawn up by the city council to create a historical monument of the old mansion.

Correction: The city council drew up papers to allow for creating a historical monument of the old mansion.

The sale of the property three years ago had been handled by buyer’s attorney.

Correction: The buyer’s attorney had handled the sale of the property three years ago.

Lunches are packed, clothes laid out, and dogs let outside. Now it’s time to wake three sleepy headed children. Teeth are brushed, hair braided, backpacks are in front of the door. Warm coats, hats and gloves are put on the children.

Correction: After packing lunches, laying out clothes, and letting out the dogs, Dawn is now ready to tackle the job of waking three sleepy-headed children. After breakfast, she braids hair, and once the children have brushed their teeth, she helps them get their backpacks in front of the door and bundles them into warm coats, hats and gloves.


Parallelism

I had been fired, thrown out of my room, condemned to die, and had numerous curses about my future heaped upon my head.

Corrected: I had been fired, thrown out of my room, condemned to die, and cursed for the rest of my future.

She loved to sing, dance, play the piano, and talking with her friends.

Corrected: She loved to sing, dance, play the piano, and talk with her friends. – OR –

She loved singing, dancing, playing the piano, and talking with her friends.


She was intelligent, serious-minded, and liked being alone.

Corrected: She was intelligent, serious-minded, and introverted.


Punctuation

Quotation Marks:

Use quotation marks at the beginning and end of any words that are dialogue.

All commas and periods go INSIDE quotation marks — ALWAYS.

Question Marks and Exclamation Points go inside the quotes if they are actually part of the quoted material, but if they are not, they go outside.

“When do we eat?” he asked.

Did you hear him say “We will eat at six.”?

Also use quotes for titles of poems, songs, articles, chapter headings, or short stories.

Special Note About Dialogue: When writing dialogue, be sure to start a new paragraph every time the speaker in a conversation changes – even if the speaker says only one word. Being sure to change paragraphs helps your reader understand who is speaking in each sentence, and this procedure also cuts down on the need to use as many tag words (such as he said, she asked, etc.)

When you need to use tag words, try to use words that will not disrupt the important words in the dialogue itself. Occasionally a word like yelled, shouted, mumbled, etc. can be effective, but the vast majority of the time, writers need to stick with the simple words like said, asked, answered. Those words are generally acknowledged by the reader’s brain without the reader actually having to interrupt the flow of the dialogue to give them any attention. Never use tag words that do not fit the tone and vocabulary level of the rest of the story or that require a reader to have to figure out the meaning or run for a dictionary.

Example: “I think you need to re-think your decision,” he interposed. (Rather, simply say, “I think you need to re-think your decision,” he said.)

Italics:

Use italics to show emphasis of a word in your narration or in the dialogue of your story.

“I absolutely refuse to accept your excuse.”

Also put titles of books, newspapers, magazines, plays, major works of art, court cases, ships, aircraft, and spacecraft in italics.

(Titles of poems, articles, or short stories are put in quotes.)

Italicize foreign words and words, numbers, and letters referred to as such. (A few foreign words have become so accepted into the English language that they do not require italics, but if you have no idea whether that is the case or not, you may always italicize the foreign word.)

Your v’s look like u’s.

I can’t say the word detritus.

What is the meaning of the word moi?

Non-Essential Elements in a Sentence

All words or phrases that are not essential to the main meaning of a sentence – which are added simply for the sake of emphasis or as extra information – are set off from the rest of the sentence with a set of commas, parentheses, or dashes.

She gave her speech, surprisingly, without saying one critical word about her opponent.

My little dog (a fuzzy gray mutt) is very good with kids.

When interrupting the flow of a sentence in a manner that could confuse the reader – or when you want to draw special attention to the interruption – always use dashes on either side of the interrupting phrase.

Also use dashes when using dialogue in a story, and one character interrupts another.

“I will not listen –”

“Don’t tell me you will not listen to me.”



Past Perfect Verb Tense (Using the helping verb had)

When you write a sentence in past tense, but are also referring to an action that took place farther into the past than the main action of the sentence, you must use Past Perfect Tense for that previous action.

Donald worked with the equipment exactly as his dad had taught him.

We all knew that the teacher had endured all she could take from us for one afternoon.



Adjectives and Adverbs

Avoid using adjectives and adverbs whenever possible. Make every effort to use such strong, colorful, specific nouns and verbs that modifiers are unnecessary.

Instead of saying this: She wore a bright red dress. Say this: She wore a scarlet dress.

Instead of saying this: The man walked slowly down the road, as if his feet weighed a ton. Say this: The man plodded down the road.

In general, follow this rule: Never use two or more words then one will do the job.



Pronouns and Antecedents

Every time a pronoun is used, it MUST CLEARLY refer to a noun that has been used previously. And the pronoun must agree with the noun to which if refers (known as its antecedent) in both gender and number.

Examples: Everyone cleaned their plates. (Everyone is singular, so pronoun has to be as well.)

Correction: Everyone cleaned his plate.

Sarah was with Kate when she signed up for the play. (‘She’ is ambiguous; which ‘she’?)
Correction: Sarah was with Kate when Sarah signed up for the play.

Be especially careful with words such as this, that, which, it. When using these pronouns, double-check to make sure your reader will know exactly which noun used earlier is the antecedent, and if there is no one single noun to which they refer, avoid using those pronouns and find a noun to use instead. One of the biggest mistakes inexperienced writers make is using this or that or it to refer to a general idea or some vague concept that was mentioned earlier. The antecedent must be one single noun that can be pointed out easily.

Example:

Writers often misuse pronouns. This results in confusion.

Correction: Writers often misuse pronouns. This misuse often results in confusion.

Or: Writers often misuse pronouns. Such mistakes often results in confusion.

Or: Writers often misuse pronouns, thus causing confusion.


GREEN TYPTER - GOLD W. TEXT
Wordiness and/or Repetition

When you edit, one of your main jobs will be to cut out any words that are not absolutely necessary.

EXAMPLE 1

He was headed towards her. She wanted to run but knew he would see her. As he came closer, she sneaked around the tree. so he wouldn’t see her. She let out a sigh of relief as she watched him disappear over the hill. She knew what she had to do now. Run.

Just deleting the words is enough correction of this section.


EXAMPLE 2

She ran, heading for the path she had taken to get there. She was running for her life. or that’s how it felt anyway. She continuously looked over her shoulder, making sure she didn’t see the gunman. The scene of the gunman throwing his victim in the well kept flashing in her mind as she ran.

Corrected: She continuously looked over her shoulder and tried to keep scenes of the gunman throwing his victim in the well from flashing through her mind as she ran.

(This change cut 28 words out of the text without changing the meaning or the effectiveness of the scene. In fact, making the scene this much tighter makes it more effective in capturing the emotions of the reader.


EXAMPLE 3

The next step was to go to Cherokee and sign into our room and get ready. We had not taken into account the many curves in the road that have to be taken at twenty-five and thirty miles per hour when we had estimated the miles and time from Pigeon Forge to Cherokee. The drive seemed to take forever …..

We then headed for Cherokee to sign into our room and get ready. We were surprised by all the curves in the road and the twenty-five to thirty miles an hour speed limit. The drive seemed to take forever ….

(This change cut 20 words out of the text, and a reader involved in the story will appreciate the cut.)



Descriptions

When describing people, places, or events, keep in mind that you and your reader are concerned about three main aspects:

Space
Mood/Tone
The 5 Senses

When describing places, be sure to keep in mind how the reader will “see” the picture you are giving him. Ask yourself these questions:

Are you moving Front to Back, Side to Side, Top to Bottom, Bottom to Top, and are you consistent in those movements?

Are you moving Up a Hill or Down a Hill?

Are you entering through a door or looking through a window, and can you really see everything you’re describing from that vantage point?

When setting the Mood, be sure to use words that have connotations that will stir up the right emotions and thoughts in your reader.

Don’t forget to make use of all five senses whenever possible. Many writers resort to sight and sound for all of their sense information. But smell, touch, and taste can be very powerful descriptors and make your writing stand out.



Transition Words:

When connecting thoughts, ideas, or actions within a paragraph or in the move from one paragraph to another, be sure you do not leave your reader wondering what relationship the ideas/actions have to each other. Make use of good transition (connecting) words to avoid problems.

If you want your reader to understand that one idea or action causes another, using words like “therefore” or “as a result” or “thus” to begin the next sentence can be very helpful.

If you have been showing one side of an issue or idea, and you are now going to look at some aspect of the opposite side of the issue, words like “however” or “but” or “nevertheless” help the reader prepare his mind to switch gears.

If you are continuing to add multiple examples or layers of information to make your point, using words like “also” or “in addition” or “furthermore” will help keep the ideas connected.

Be sure the words you use for transition make absolutely clear what the relationship is between the ideas or actions. If in doubt, look up the words you are considering in a dictionary and be sure of their meanings before using them. Use of a thesaurus (lists of synonyms) is also helpful. If, for example, you know you want a word that means “also,” but you do not want to use that particular word again, you can use a thesaurus to get a good synonym that will do the same job. As you edit, look for places that need transition words or phrases, or that may be using words that confuse the issue.

Remember: Never add words just to add words. Be sure you NEED them to make the text flow well. Your number one rule is still to say as much as you can, as specifically and colorfully as you can, in as few words as possible.



Paragraphs:

Each individual paragraph should be devoted to developing one point or aspect of your article or story. In non-fiction, whatever you focus on in the first sentence of your paragraph should then get some detailed development before you move out of that paragraph — and any other main points should be saved for another paragraph, rather than having all the thoughts thrown in together. (Some writers use a form that does not make the main point of each paragraph in the first sentence, but until you are a seasoned, experienced writer, you will have much more success if you try to get your reader focused on the main idea of each individual paragraph with the first sentence.)

In fiction, paragraphs can change more irregularly. For example, in dialogue, every time the speaker changes, a new paragraph begins. And sometimes, in order to heighten suspense, authors may use a separate paragraph for each step of action in an especially important scene. Still, you want to be sure you are changing paragraphs for a specific and necessary reason, and not just because you don’t know how to develop ideas. Fiction allows for more freedom of form, but you want to be sure you decide on the form you will use throughout the story and stick with it from beginning to end.



When I teach my college creative writing classes, we don’t usually have much class time to spend on basic grammar. The curriculum assumes that students have learned the basics and used them for years prior to taking the writing classes. However, there are always students who, for one reason or another, never got a good grounding in grammar in the past, so I do try to include a lot of these basics in the material I hand out for them. We generally take one class period to go over most of these points, and then they take this chapter home to study. But they can ask questions throughout the rest of the term if they need to do so.

You may do the same. If any of these rules of good writing cause confusion or raise other questions in your minds, please feel free to leave your questions in a “Comment” window below.

Happy Writing.


* Releasing the Creative Writer in You, © 2013 by Sandra Pavloff Conner

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My Poetic Sin


QUILL & BOOK FOR PROFILE SHARPCinquain
It is my sin:
To take the easy way.
No rhyming and no meter strong.
Guilty!

But still
I plead my case.
It gives me more than joy.
It disciplines my use of words:
Aids skill.

So now,
My guilt assuaged,
I’m free to give myself
To writing even more cinquain.
Hooray!

 


I discovered recently that I have written so much cinquain over the past two years that I have enough to do a book of nothing but original cinquain.
So, I just might.

 



 

A Celebration Sale

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Hey, St. Ellen Press is offering a terrific sale of my Smoky Mountain Series e-books this month — in honor of the series coming to Amazon in paperback versions. Book # 1 in the Series – Set Free To Love – just went onto the Amazon market in paperback about a week ago, and Book # 2 – Cameron’s Rib – will be available there by the end of next week.

So —– to celebrate —- the e-book version of Set Free To Love goes on a wild sale for $0.99 for the next 7 days — beginning at 12:00 a.m. U. S. Pacific Time today, May 6.

And that’s not all: Beginning today, the three other books in the series will also be on sale for 2.99 for the rest of the Month of May. I’m excited. To read about each book and check out the reviews start at my Amazon Author’s page, where you’ll find links to all of them, as well as some other information.

Want a tiny hint about the stories?

Maddison Holt is a private detective who is so bound by grief, guilt, and self-incrimination that he feels unfit to love. Cameron McDaniels is a pastor who believes he has found the one woman who is the answer to his prayer for a helpmate, but she is still mourning the death of a past fiance and is afraid to love again. Lionel Butler has caused many a girl’s heart to flutter, but he never even notices because he’s convinced he’s destined to be a bad husband and father. His future looks bleak and hopeless. Professor Jonah McDaniels is a talented violinist and conductor. He’s intelligent, charming, and ‘knock-em-off-their-feet’ gorgeous. But he feels unworthy of being loved by the one woman he knows is the only woman he’ll ever give his heart to.

These 4 men’s lives intertwine as “The Smoky Mountain Series” carries the reader through the 4 novels. Read their stories and let God’s great plan for restoring their lives inspire and encourage your own heart.


P. S.   Or maybe I should make that Pssssssst.  I just had a thought. Mother’s Day is coming up, and if mom enjoys reading inspirational fiction, these would make a great gift. And Amazon offers a free app for any device, so she doesn’t even have to own a Kindle.

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An ‘Innocent’ Crime & Romance Story

SIM. ST. INNOCENT FRONT AM. COVER2My newest release is a Crime & Romance Novella — Book 1 of the Simon Stone Detective Series. The series is  composed of ‘On Target, Quick-Read’ Novellas that should appeal to busy readers.

Book 1 is a story that I originally wrote right here on this blog: INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY

Here’s a peek at what it’s about:

Deanna Forbes is a suspect in a murder investigation, but that fact doesn’t interfere with her desires. And, as a woman, she finds herself attracted to Detective Simon Stone, who conducts the two interviews with her before she is taken off the suspect list. She surprises Stone, and herself, when she invites him to have dinner with her so she can get to know him better.

Simon is a detective with a heart, and, so far, that heart has never been broken. So falling in love with a woman he suspects of murder doesn’t seem like a smart thing to do. But sometimes the heart has a mind of its own. He may be the sharpest detective on the force, but love is not a subject covered in the standard law enforcement manuals.

Paperback – $4.99 – from Amazon.


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‘Smoky Mountain Series’ has come to Amazon in Paperback

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SET FREE AMAZON FRONT COVERThis week Book 1 of the Smoky Mountain Series took it’s place in the Paperback Inspirational Novel section of the Amazon book store.  I’m really happy to report that this first book of the series —Set Free To Love —  is now available at a new lower price — only $8.99.

It’s only a story — but when Private Detective Maddison Holt, Uncle Matt, Beth Hanover, and her young brother Lex get hold of your heart, you won’t feel like it’s just a story —– and you won’t want to miss picking up Book 2 of the series as soon as possible. The Smoky Mountain Series brings you stories where strong, loving, courageous characters meet the challenges of life with the power of God’s Word, and where true romance wins out over all.

Set Free To Love

As his vision suddenly blurred, Maddison realized he’d let it happen again. He swiped at his eyes with a thumb and forefinger, trying at the same time to pinch back more tears. He’d have to pull off the highway if he didn’t get better control of himself. The next moment, he could feel the anger boiling up from deep inside, needing an outlet. He’d swung back and forth like this relentlessly, between tears and anger for … how many weeks had it been now? Way too many … but then not really enough … not enough to dull the pain or answer any of the questions.

This first book in the Smoky Mountain Series follows private detective Maddison Holt’s journey from grief, guilt, and self-incrimination to a place where he is released from all of those burdens and able to freely give himself to loving and being loved. Order it here.

 

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‘SLATE’ now in Paperback on Amazon

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Okay, all you folks out there who — like me — want to read a “real” book instead of a digital device, I have good news. The wait is over. Amazon now has my newest inspirational novel, SLATE, in paperback. I do a lot of reading online for hours every day. But when I want to relax and forget the whole rest of the world, I like to curl up in a comfortable place and hold an honest-to-goodness “book” in my hands while I read. Most all of my books come out in paperback and digital both, but until this past year, the paperbacks were not available on Amazon. Now all of them will be available there very soon.

If you didn’t see my promo for SLATE (the e-book) several months ago, you probably want to know what the book’s about. So I’ll give you a short trailer here to whet your appetite.  Then you can find the book in paperback at this link.  And don’t forget: if you do read it and like it, please leave me a review on the Amazon page. And if you don’t like it — just don’t say anything, okay?  Thank you.

 

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Daily Post Prompt: ‘As the Plot Unravels’ – a short story

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MAN AT DESK b & w“I don’t know what to do,” Neville groaned, rubbing his hands roughly over his face. Then he pushed his laptop out of the way and leaned both elbows onto the coffeehouse table, propping his chin in his hands.

“What’s wrong?” Clarence, the waiter bussing the table next to Neville’s, turned to question him

Neville looked up, startled. “Oh … blast … I didn’t realize I had said that out loud. Sorry,” he added looking sheepishly around the room to see if other customers had heard. He was relieved to see that Elixir of Life Coffeehouse was having one of its quieter days.

“No problem,” Clarence answered and walked over to Neville’s table. “Can I get you a refill?”

“Yeah, that would be great,” Neville answered, handing the boy his cup. “It’s been a rough writing day.”

The young man returned in record time with Neville’s refill and stayed to talk a moment. “Do you have what they call writer’s block?”

“No.” Neville shook his head and continued. “No, Clarence. This isn’t writer’s block. In fact, I almost wish I did have that dreaded condition. My problem isn’t that I can’t get the story to move along. This story is moving along at an incredible pace. The problem is that it’s writing itself, and my original plot is unraveling as fast as I can put my fingers to the keys.”

“You mean you’re not in control of your own story?” Clarence looked at Neville as if he had lost his mind — just a little. And that made Neville laugh.

“Don’t worry, my boy,” he said. “I’ve not gone bonkers yet. And … thanks for making me laugh. It helps. But to answer your question, no, I’m not in control of my own story.”

“Well, how does that happen?” Clarence asked, really into this new information he was being exposed to.

“Well it’s not too unusual for a writer to get into a novel and find that one of his characters seems to gravitate in a direction other than what he had originally planned — or that the story seems to be flowing toward an ending that’s different from what he jotted down in his outline. But what’s happening in my story is different.”

“How?”

Neville shook his head and sighed. “I’m not sure how it’s happened, but every character seems to be taking on a brand new identity and making his own decisions. The guy I had pegged as the hero has suddenly become the villain, and the woman he loves is rapidly developing feelings for his best friend — which means he will probably end up killing his best friend — he’s already entertained the idea — and maybe even offing the woman as well.”

“But does it matter who ends up being the villain and the hero — I mean — as long as you have one of each, it’ll come out even, right?”

Neville chuckled. “Well, it’s not quite that easy. My publisher assigned me a contract to do a specific kind of story. One that will be a believable sequel to my last three novels. They were moneymakers, and I’d hate to mess up a record like that. I spent the money I made on them, and now I need more.” He rubbed his face agitatedly again. “Besides that, I’d be breaking my contract if I didn’t give them what I guaranteed.”

“MmMmm, you do have a problem,” Clarence said, so engulfed in the conversation now that he just sat right down at the table beside Neville.  They both sat in silence for a moment, and then Clarence asked, “Well, why don’t you just delete all that part that changed and go back to your first chapter and start over on the story you intended to write. That would take care of it wouldn’t it?”

“Well, that’s the other problem. I’ve totally lost track of the story I intended to write … and besides ….” He paused and glanced off to the side, lost in thought for a long moment. Clarence waited, figuring Neville was trying to work out a plan.

Suddenly Neville looked back at Clarence with a smile on his face. He looked serene rather than agitated, and Clarence was a little confused. “You figure something out? How to stop this runaway story?”

“Nope,” Neville said, grinning wider. “I’m not going to stop this story, Clarence.”

“Huh?”

Neville reached over and rested his hand on Clarence’s shoulder. “Clarence, my boy, I’ve made a decision. I’m going to give this story my whole heart and soul and let it lead me wherever it wants to go.”

“But what about your contract and all?”

“Blast the contract,” Neville said, beginning to close up his laptop and slip his notes into his briefcase. “If that publisher can’t see the truth about the value of this story, then he can sue me.”

“But –”

“No more ‘but’s‘ my boy,” Neville answered, rising from his chair, laptop under his arm. “This is the best damn story I’ve ever written in my life, and I’ve just decided I’m free enough to give my creativity its own head and let it take me to my destiny.”

He slapped down his last five dollar bill as a tip for Clarence and headed out the door, whistling.


To participate visit Daily Post.

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‘Releasing the Creative Writer in You’ – Lesson 7

releasing-the-creative-writer-in-you-coverI’ll be posting my creative writing lessons only once a month now, on the first Saturday. Can you believe this is already the first day of April?  (NO FOOLIN’). To access other lessons in this series, click on “Creative Writing Class” in the navigation bar and scroll through to find the lessons you need.

LESSON 7: AVOIDING DRAGGY DETAILS AND CHOPPY SENTENCES

A.  DRAGGY DETAILS

When telling a story, you have to keep the dialogue and action moving at a good pace to hold the reader’s attention, and your details need to be specific things that make the scene more alive or more colorful.

Think about this example: If I were telling you about my date on Friday night, and I said, “We walked into the restaurant, and the waiter led us to a table at the back of the room. Then we picked up the menus and took some time looking over the possibilities. When the waiter came back with our drinks, we gave him our order,” you would think, “Well, of course, you walked to the table and sat down, and, of course, you looked at the menu and then gave the waiter your order.”

What I need to do — if I’m going to make my story interesting — is use only details that add something the average reader would not automatically put into the scene himself. So I could say something like “We had a great table, right by the window so that we could look out on the river. The spicy aromas wafting from the kitchen increased our appetites, and when the menu came, we both got so absorbed in the huge variety of entrees that it took us fifteen minutes to make a decision. But our waiter was extremely patient, and we finally decided on fruit cocktail,  Caesar salads, and Porter House steaks.”

But WHY are you putting this paragraph into the story in the first place? Ask yourself if these details are truly IMPORTANT to your story. If the answer is ‘no,’ then LEAVE THEM OUT. If the answer is yes, be sure the reader can easily make the connection.

One other alternative to that scene could be something like this scene, which emphasizes a totally different aspect of the evening, and which has a specific reason for being in the story: “The atmosphere in the restaurant seemed set for romance. From the time we sat down at the table, Roger and I both had trouble deciding on our choices for entrees because we just couldn’t seem to keep our eyes off each other. We finally managed to order, but as soon as the waiter stepped away from the table, Roger reached for my hand, and we were still holding hands when the first course arrived.” This scene is building on a relationship between characters and is simply using the meal as a setting.

Remember not to waste words telling your reader anything that he will already know. If you have a scene that is so very ordinary the reader could write it for you – if there is nothing really special, unusual, or super important to the plot in it – LEAVE IT OUT. You can refer to it having happened without describing it.

For example: If it’s important to my story to let the reader know that Roger and I went out Friday night, then I can always find a place to toss in that information. I can say to a friend, “When Roger and I went out Friday night, we tried a new restaurant.” OR “Roger and I went out again Friday night, and I can tell that our relationship is getting serious.” But I haven’t bored my reader with the details of an “ordinary” date.

Here’s another example of a scene that is too ordinary.

‘When the time came for the ceremony to begin, Abby’s father took her arm and walked her down the aisle. He turned her over to John, and as the bride and groom smiled at each other, the minister began the ceremony. Abby and John said their vows solemnly and then exchanged rings.”

Since everyone reading your book knows exactly what an “ordinary” wedding ceremony is like, they will be bored reading this. If there are several passages like that in your book, the chances are good the the reader will put it down before he’s done. So – again – if you do not have anything going on that the reader will not automatically assume anyway – just refer to it obliquely in order the let the reader know it happened.

However, if you want to make a point of how emotional the bride and groom were during the ceremony, then you may have a reason to give more details, and you can say something like this: “Abby was so excited that her knees wobbled as she took hold of her father’s arm to walk down the aisle, but he patted her hand and smiled reassuringly, as he had done all through her childhood. This moment would be her last opportunity to interact with her father as merely his child. In a few more minutes, she would be another man’s wife, and her life would never be the same. As she and John spoke their vows, they both had tears in their eyes, and their hands shook a little when they exchanged rings. But they weren’t nervous or afraid — just excited about living out this dream together.”

cartoon-writer-pink-spikey-hair-2
B. SHORT, CHOPPY SENTENCES

The best way to avoid short, choppy sentences is to make sure you use good variety. Make it a point to use some compound or complex sentences. Both of these are explained below, with examples of each.

The best writing always uses great variety in sentence structure and length. Most readers expect to feel a sort of ebb and flow in the way thoughts are expressed. It’s the way we think and the way we talk to each other. The most important thing to remember when deciding what kind of sentence to use is that emotions and/or thoughts cause actions – and actions cause thoughts and/or emotions. You never do or say anything for no reason, and neither do your characters. So you want the reader to understand the connections and relationships between thoughts, feelings, reasons, actions, etc. Tying thoughts together into some compound and complex sentences helps the reader do that. So, keep the writing interesting by using all three kinds of sentences to their best advantage.

Here are some examples of poor sentence choices and some corrections for those problems:

Very Poor Grammar:  Mary stopped at the store to get some milk, she bought lettuce and tomatoes too.  (This is a run-on sentence because it has 2 separate, complete thoughts, but only a comma between them.)

Slightly Better: Mary stopped at the store to get some milk. She bought lettuce and tomatoes too.  (This example is 2 choppy sentences.  Much better than the run-on — and they are okay once in a while — but you don’t want this pattern too often.)

Better:  Mary stopped at the store to get some milk, and she bought lettuce and tomatoes too. (Compound sentence because it connects 2 complete thoughts by using the conjunctions ‘and, but, or, nor, or yet.’ When using those conjunctions, you DO use the comma as well – before the conjunction. You just never use the comma alone to connect 2 complete thoughts.)

Best: Mary stopped at the store to get some milk, and while she was there anyway, she picked up lettuce and tomatoes too.

OR:  Since Mary had to stop at the store for some milk, she decided to get lettuce and tomatoes too.

(These last 2 sentences are Complex sentences, which use one completely independent clause (which could stand alone as a sentence) and one clause that cannot stand alone because it is dependent on the other clause to make sense. In both of these, the dependent clause tells the reader the reason Mary bought the extra food. Also, while giving that reason, the clause takes care of any other information that the reader needs, and that information doesn’t have to be put into its own short sentence.)

Remember, you want a variety. There are times when three or four short, choppy sentences can be very effective if you need a specific tone or mood in the scene, but make sure short, choppy, staccato is the feel you want your reader to have before using very many sentences like that.

Mainly, remember that you want the reader to understand the connections and relationships between thoughts, feelings, reasons, actions, etc. Tying thoughts together into some compound and complex sentences helps the reader do that.

Example:

Choppy:  Roger was afraid. He did not want to let it show. He was the first to volunteer for the rescue mission.

Much better:  Roger was afraid, but he did not want to let it show, so he made sure he was the first to volunteer for the rescue mission.

OR

Because Roger wanted to hide his fear, he made himself sign up as the first volunteer for the rescue mission.  (This example also cuts out words, and doesn’t leave out anything important. If you tell the reader Roger wants to hide his fear, then the reader knows Roger’s afraid, and you don’t have to say that.)

Question: Is there such a thing as a sentence that is too long? Yes, if you have included so much information that the reader could get confused – or if reading the sentence aloud causes the reader to run out of breath – then it may be too long. But that can be fixed as well, simply by taking one portion of the information and putting it into a separate sentence. There is no simple way to help any writer decide when he needs to go longer or shorter. But the more the writer observes real-live conversations, and the more he reads his work aloud, the better he will get at making those decisions.


* Releasing the Creative Writer in You, © 2013 by Sandra Pavloff Conner

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‘Releasing the Creative Writer in You’ – Lesson 6

To access other lessons in this series, click on “Creative Writing Class” in the navigation bar and scroll through to find the lessons you need.

releasing-the-creative-writer-icover-editedLESSON # 6: BODY MOVEMENT AND DIALOGUE MAKE A STORY COME ALIVE

As you develop your plot, remember to use as much dialogue and body movement as possible to help the reader see and hear the words and actions. Simply narrating it is much less effective. Quote your characters directly, and let the reader hear a sigh or see the character lean against a door frame. Describe a smile or the sound of the laughter. Allow your character to lean forward or backward, prop his foot on a stool, rest his head against the back of a chair, or fold his arms across his chest. No real person carries on a conversation without body movement as well, and you need that kind of description to keep your reader’s attention and make your characters “real.”

Beginning writers often find themselves skipping this very important principle. They get involved in “telling” their story and just continue to narrate the events without any individual detailed action and without letting their characters carry on real conversations. That lack of material is generally why some beginning writers have problems filling out scenes and developing entire novels. But once you get into the habit of adding these two very important elements to your writing, you will find that you enjoy writing even more, and that you have less problem creating real-life, fully developed scenes for your story.

Now, of course, adding just any old movement or dialogue will not work either. The characters’ behavior and conversations have to fit the story and be totally relevant – even important – to the story itself. Keep checking to be sure that every conversation and every scene is actually moving your story forward and not just taking up space.

Remember also, that tag words (things like “he said / she asked”) need to be kept at a minimum and need to be simple, ordinary words as often as possible. Some new writers have the mistaken idea that they should reach for a variety of words or for unusual words to use with quotes. That’s exactly what you don’t want to do. Those unusual words stick out like the proverbial “sore thumb” in the middle of dialogue and interrupt it. Except in very rare instances, you’re much better off using the ordinary words like “said” or “asked.” Occasionally, in a scene where they would be perfectly applicable, you might venture out to tag words like “whispered” or “shouted.” But the number one rule is to keep those tags as inconspicuous as possible.

The next rule you want to remember is to begin a brand new paragraph each time the speaker changes in a conversation – even if the previous speaker said only one word. When you stay faithful to that rule, you end up needing far fewer tag words to begin with – particularly if you have only two speakers. Once you identify the original speaker and then identify the person who answers him, changing paragraphs for each one will keep your reader aware of who is saying what. If your conversation lasts for more than a page, you need to throw in a couple more tags here and there, just for extra clarity, but it’s amazing how easily readers will follow your conversations with no other help when you follow these two basic rules.

QUIVER FULL COVER - GOLDBelow, I’ve given you two versions of the same excerpt from my novel A Quiver Full of Arrows. The first excerpt uses very little body language and dialogue. The author narrates what is happening, but does not show the characters in action or let them speak on their own. In the second, you will see how much more color and interest is added by letting the characters speak their own words in normal conversation and by showing the reader even small unremarkable body movements.

In order to better grasp the way these writing tools are used, I’ve made the dialogue a sort of turquoise color and the body movement sections a shade of purple. I tried highlighting them, but could not get the highlights to copy and paste into this editing window. So I’ll work with what I’ve got.  And the color variation will help you see exactly what was added to get the better version.

Version # 1 – Mostly narration with only a small amount of body movement or dialogue. (Remember: dialogue is only the words within quotation marks. Any other mode of letting your reader know what a character said is narration.)

Peanut shells! Again! Handfuls of peanut shells scattered around the steps of the front porch!

How were they getting there?

Lawson Wainright walked around the small piles that were littering the sidewalk and the edge of the grass beside the steps. He stood for several more minutes, looking around the yard, turning his tall, lean body full circle . . . but there was no one in sight.

He looked up into the branches of the tree just a few yards away. He supposed it could be birds or squirrels. But he just didn’t think an animal would leave the shells looking like this. The nuts had obviously been broken open carefully. . . . .

He went to get a rake and some garbage bags to gather up the shells. While he was raking up the shells, Elmer Peabody, his 75-year-old neighbor from across the street came over. “Looks like you’re rakin’ up peanut shells again,” he said.

Lawson agreed and asked Mr. Peabody if he had seen anyone unusual in the neighborhood recently. Mr. Peabody replied that he hadn’t seen anything so far and asked if the shells were all still intact the way they had been the other times. Lawson told him that they were.

Eventually Mr. Peabody began to walk around the area himself, looking closely at the foundation of the house, where Lawson had added white latticework that ran along the front, below the porch, and met the steps on each side.

Elmer was leaning down close to the foundation right where Lawson had been raking up the shells, and all of a sudden he shouted. “By Jove! Did you know that your lattice is broken here, L.W.?”

“Broken?” Lawson asked. “Where?”

“Right here,” Mr. Peabody answered and handed Lawson a piece of the loose lattice.

Lawson couldn’t understand how it could have broken because he had put it in place last summer, and it was all secure. He finally stooped down and looked more closely.

The area under the porch was spacious and dry, and Lawson crawled in to have a better look.

“What in heaven’s name!” he shouted from under the porch.

“Did you find something?” Elmer asked.

Lawson crawled back out from under the porch and looked up at Elmer. “I found two sleeping bags and a can of peanuts under there,” he said. He was hoping Elmer might be able to help explain what was happening, but Elmer was equally stunned.

After a few seconds, Lawson laughed out loud. He told Elmer that he felt like the three bears who had come home and found someone had been sleeping in their beds. Elmer asked Lawson if he had any idea who it could be.

“I don’t have a clue,” Lawson said. But, suddenly, he remembered something.



Version # 2: A considerable amount of dialogue and body movement has been added to this version. Compare the effectiveness of Version # 2 with that of Version # 1. Which story will hold your reader’s attention better and help him relate to your characters?

Peanut shells! Again! Handfuls of peanut shells scattered around the steps of the front porch!

How were they getting there?

Lawson Wainright walked around the small piles that were littering the sidewalk and the edge of the grass beside the steps. In frustration, he ran his hands through his short brown hair, and as he did so, the sunshine caught sections of it and highlighted them with streaks of copper. He let his hand slip down to the back of his neck, massaging it a little as he shook his head back and forth slowly, still trying to reason out the solution to this strange development.

Then he stood for several more minutes, resting both hands on his hips and looking slowly around the yard, turning his tall, lean body full circle . . . but there was no one in sight. He looked up into the branches of the tree just a few yards away. He supposed it could be birds or squirrels. But after a moment, he shook his head again. No … he just didn’t think an animal would leave the shells looking like this. The nuts had obviously been broken open carefully. . . . .

He shrugged his shoulders now and let out a sigh, turning as he did so to walk around the house to the garage, where he extricated a lightweight rake from a jumbled collection of yard care equipment. He returned to the front yard, where he began to rake the small piles into one larger heap in order to scoop them into a garbage bag he had carried over along with the rake.

“Hey, L. W.” The voice of his seventy-five-year-old neighbor across the street got his attention. “Looks like you’re rakin’ up peanut shells again.”

Lawson couldn’t help chuckling and shaking his head in consternation again as he stilled his rake and looked at Mr. Elmer Peabody. “Looks like,” he called back, leaning slightly on the rake now as he gave his attention to his favorite neighbor.

“Still no idea how they’re gettin’ into your yard?” Elmer asked as he started across the street.

“Nope. You still haven’t seen anything or anyone unusual, have you?”

“Not so far.” Mr. Peabody took off his gardening hat as he crossed the yard and scratched his almost bald head. “’Course, that don’t mean nothin’,” he added. “I hardly ever look outside after dark, and early in the mornin’ I’m eatin’ my breakfast and lookin’ out my back window at the birds.” By the time he’d finished answering Lawson’s question, he was beside him, watching him finish his clean-up job. “Were the shells all neat and clean again like the other times?”

“Yeah … just exactly like the last three times.”

“Mm-mm!” Elmer Peabody grunted, shaking his head back and forth. He began to walk around the area in tight circles, finally bending over and looking along the foundation of the house, where Lawson had added white latticework that ran along the front, below the porch, and met the steps on each side. …

All of a sudden Elmer shouted, “By Jove! Did you know that your lattice is broken here, L.W.?”

“Broken?” Lawson asked, stepping over to stand beside his neighbor. “Where?”

“Right here,” Mr. Peabody said, reaching out to take hold of a loose 3-foot section of the white lattice and lift it away from the rest of the porch. He held it up for Lawson to inspect.

“Well, I’ll be!” Lawson said, taking the piece of latticework in his hands. “How on earth did that happen? I just put that up last summer, and it was all secure.” He studied the piece of wood he held in his hands. “Hmm … it looks like the nails have been worked loose and just pulled out, but nothing’s broken off.He stooped down to look more closely under the porch.

The area beneath the porch was quite spacious, and stayed fairly dry most of the year, unless they had heavy rain or snow. He could easily crawl under it himself and move around, but he hadn’t done so since he’d put up the lattice. Now he got down on his hands and knees and eased his way into the three-foot opening.

“What in Heaven’s name!” His voice came out sounding muffled from beneath the porch, and Elmer Peabody leaned a little closer to hear better as Lawson spoke again. “I don’t believe my eyes!”

“What’d you find?” Elmer asked, excitement filling his voice now. This was an adventure for him. He hadn’t had this much interesting activity in his neighborhood since Hilda Gates, next door to him, had set her kitchen on fire trying to make a big rum cake. ….

Lawson hadn’t said anything else for a minute or so, and Elmer leaned in even closer and stuck his head inside the opening.What did you find? What’s going on?”

“Sleeping bags!”

Sleeping bags?” Elmer couldn’t believe he’d heard right.

“Yeah … two of them, and a big metal can full of peanuts!” Lawson began to ease backwards out of the opening, and Elmer moved away to give him room.

“Did I hear you right? Sleeping bags?”

Lawson was still crouched down close to the ground, and he looked up at Elmer, his face a perfect picture of consternation. “Elmer, there are two rolled-up sleeping bags under my porch, and a large metal can full of peanuts in the shells.” His eyes still registered his shock, and then a quizzical look came into them, almost as if he hoped that his neighbor, somehow, would have the explanation.

When he realized that Elmer’s face was as full of surprise as his own must be, he added, grinning in spite of himself, “I feel a little like the three bears who came home and discovered that someone had been sleeping in their beds.” He laughed out loud then. In spite of the obvious seriousness of the discovery, he couldn’t help himself. “Mr. Peabody … somebody’s been sleeping under my porch!”

“And havin’ a midnight snack on top of that,” Elmer said, chuckling and scratching his head again. “By Jove! I wonder who in the world it could be.”

Lawson shook his head again and picked up the piece of lattice to replace it. “I can’t imagine – unless – ” His voice trailed off, and he sat back on his haunches, looking off into space. . . . He had just remembered a recent news story. …


With this second version, not only is the scene fully fleshed out, but the reader actually feels that he is getting to know the two people involved. As we discussed in the chapter on developing characters, we get to know real people in our lives by talking with them, seeing them in action, and learning how they treat and interact with others. That’s also the best way for readers to get to know the characters in a story. As a result, those characters seem real, and the reader connects with them enough to want to read to the end.
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* Releasing the Creative Writer in You, © 2013 by Sandra Pavloff Conner

NOTE:  My schedule has become a little over-loaded this month, so I’m going to have to hit the ‘pause’ button on my plan to offer a creative writing lesson every Saturday. I’ll try to post a lesson at least once a month for a while, but that may be the best I can do. I hope these have been a help and encouragement to some of you, and I’ll add more as often as I can.

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‘Releasing the Creative Writer in You’ Lesson 5

To access previous lessons in this series, simply click on “Creative Writing Class” in the navigation bar, and scroll through to find the lessons you need.

releasing-the-creative-writer-icover-editedLESSON # 5: DEVELOPING CHARACTERS

Plot-Driven Stories vs. Character-Driven Stories

(Plot, remember is basically the action – problem/conflict, attempts to resolve problem, climax, resolution)

Plot-Driven stories focus on the action. However, great-selling authors also develop their characters with care and detail. The most popular action novels generally have a large following because the readers can identify with the hero/heroine. It is hard to identify with characters that have no depth – are only one-dimensional. This problem is the biggest hazard of writing plot-driven literature. You must resist the tendency to let characters remain as one-dimensional beings who are obviously just manipulated by the author to fit the action.

Stories with no character development can entertain for the short-term but generally have no lasting quality.

Character-Driven stories give the reader someone to identify with. But those characters have to be “real, and they have to be living, changing, growing. (Unless your bent is focused on degeneration. Then they need to degenerate.) Every single character may not change significantly, but certainly your hero/herione will, and his changes will normally effect changes in other characters as well.

How Does Your Reader Get To Know Your Characters?

All great stories reveal and develop each individual character through use of three basic tools:

1. Pointedly describing the characters – physically, psychologically, emotionally. Giving your reader the details of the characters’ physical appearance or his psychological bent works well up to a point. But this tool needs to be used sparingly. It leads to just “telling” the reader about the character instead of letting the reader himself get to know that person the way he would get to know any person in real life.

2. Revealing a character’s speech, thoughts, and behavior. “A picture is worth a thousand words” is a quote often used to praise photography over verbal descriptions. But the truth of it applies to writing stories even when photographs or illustrations are not used. When an author uses his words carefully enough to show the reader what a character is like, rather than explaining through narration, the reader gets a much better handle on that character. Let your character speak and carry on dialogue with others. Let him act and react to others. His true nature will come out in his words and actions. It’s when the reader can discover for himself what a character is like that he more fully connects with him.

3. Describing opinions and reactions of other characters to that character. What the other members of the cast of your story feel and say about each character – and how they react to him — reveals that character in light of relationships within the story. That aspect of characterization adds much more depth to the story as a whole.

MAN PROFILEWhat About Your Hero/Heroine?

Hero/heroine: The principal figure in an action, event, or story. This person will obviously be the central focus of your story, and it is his development – his learning, changing, experiencing epiphanies, maturing, growing, becoming better, stronger, wiser, healthier, etc. that will give the story its meaning and satisfy your reader. It is the hero – along with the help of the other characters – who is the driving force behind the action.

WOMAN SILHOUETTE, PONYTAILAll other characters need good development as well. Having a well-developed hero with no one to interact with except one-dimensional, cardboard characters will stifle the hero’s development as well.

The Hero/Herione’s Progression:


Most good stories will take that hero through about 6 main stages as the story moves along:

1. Hero is introduced: You need to know how and why he is the center of your book.

Why will this guy – instead of someone else — do the job of making this book a great read?

2. The hero has experienced – or is experiencing – a certain amount of preparation for what he will do in the story. Let the reader see that he is a certain type of person and that he has had experiences that will eventually lead him to specific action or reactions later in the story. His actions and reactions need to seem real.

This process can include some involved background – if you have a long enough story to work with – and it can be added a little at a time as the action ensues. Or it can be a well-placed couple of sentences that use exact descriptive words. In a novel, you may tell the reader a little of the character’s background, but then let the rest come out through conversations with other characters, or a situation that causes the character to remember events in his past, etc. You may even introduce a separate character who reveals some of the main character’s past that lets the reader know what caused the hero to be the person he is today. Even in a short story, try to avoid just telling the facts. Let them come to light through as much natural action and interaction between characters as possible.

3. The hero moves into his journey – his quest – his effort to reach his goal – his effort to defeat an enemy. This aspect of the story will involve a series of battles or conflicts that come against him, and he must decide whether to go forward or pull back. His nature – that you have developed well – will determine that decision. (Now your reader may still be learning about his nature, and these decisions will give that reader a clearer and clearer picture of who this guy is. But YOU should already know his character well-enough to know what he will do and WHY.

(Occasionally, authors will find themselves in the middle of a scene, and suddenly feel the character pulling to go an unexpected direction. That situation can lead to a whole new aspect for the story that makes it better. However, it can also sidetrack a good story that’s well underway. So if this happens, take a little time to re-evaluate and determine if what this character seems to want to do really has value. You may even pull up a new document page and allow yourself to write the alternative scene with the character acting “out of character,” but don’t delete the original plan unless you are totally convinced that plan number two is much better.)

*** Keep double checking your story to make sure that every sentence is actually moving the story forward and not just filling up space on the page.  ***

4. The hero/herione will eventually come head-to-head with the main antagonist. You must decide how soon that takes place. They may have met very early in the story, but their battle for the climax of the story will not take place until your character development and your action is ready for it.

Who is that antagonist? He will be the killer, the rival lover, the mean banker ready to foreclose, the evil totalitarian government system that is taking over a free nation, a killer storm raging across the country, destructive beings from another planet, some mysterious disease that can’t be stopped by drugs, the devil himself. Whatever mask the antagonist wears, he is the embodiment of evil as opposed to the hero who is the embodiment of good. This antagonist, too, must be well-developed prior to this climaxing battle.

Note: Modern novels have had a tendency to produce heroes who are so imperfect and fallible that they offer no “higher level” of character or lifestyle to which the reader can aspire. That is certainly acceptable, of course, but the greatest novels of all time – those that have outlasted the millions that see bookstore shelves for 3 months and then dwindle away – are those with heroes or heroines who have something above and beyond the “average” or the mundane in their make-up. And in spite of the fact that people say they want “realism” in their books and movies, the truth is that almost every human being secretly wants a role model that is just a little “bigger than life” to identify with – and wants a level of life that is just a little bit better/higher/freer/more successful/more loving than what he is experiencing now.

So while you may not want to write a book that is particularly positive in theme or that has a “happy ending,” you may still want to be sure that your hero/heroine offers the reader something “better” than ordinary to identify with and aspire to.

By the time the hero enters into the decisive battle with the main antagonist, you must have made him so believable and reliable that your reader will know what to expect in his actions and reactions.

5. The hero will win the battle with the main antagonist. This action – whether physical, spiritual, or mental, will be the end of the climax of the story.

6. The hero will be changed/transformed by the end of the story. He will be different in some way. He may have learned something, found new qualities in himself he didn’t know were there, realized he’s capable of giving/loving/creating more, etc, etc. Also, as he moves into and enjoys these changes, they transfer to the reader, and the reader benefits from them as well.

This kind of strong identification makes for memorable, lasting stories – and also builds a strong base for any sequels or series that you want to create.

Needless to say, the other characters in the story will undergo their own changes, and these will be important to your reader as well. But the process of developing the hero and moving him through his 6-step process works the same way for each character. For the most part, you need to create each character with as much care as you do your hero. The “realness” of the other characters can make or break the story as well.

DRAGON W. BOY - LARGERThese basic rules of good character development apply equally in children’s literature — whether the characters are children or animals. The principles are still the same, and the readers respond to characters pretty much the same way at all levels.

So take time to get to know your characters personally. Write out a checklist that will clarify the basics aspects of their personalities, experiences, and relationships. Even writing up a complete character sketch on each one is never a waste of time. Everything you can do to make sure those characters are “real” will give your story that much better chance to find a special place in the hearts of readers for generations to come.


* Releasing the Creative Writer in You, © 2013 by Sandra Pavloff Conner

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‘Releasing the Creative Writer in You: Lesson 4

To access other lessons in this series, simply click on “Creative Writing Class” in the navigation bar, and scroll through to find the lessons you need.

releasing-the-creative-writer-icover-editedLESSON # 4: PLOTTING YOUR STORY

First, let’s look again at the main parts of the plot of a story:

Most authors and writing teachers agree that all stories should have an arc of somewhere between five and eight steps. That arc takes the reader from a state of rest (before the story opens) into action, then through the process of one action causing another and another, until those actions reach a climax and finally ebb into the resolution of the story. A normal arc generally includes all of the following:

A. The presentation of the conflict

B. The hero’s attempts to resolve that conflict

C. His deliberate choices to fight or give up – use force or peaceful measures – take the legal way or the illegal way, etc.

D. His ultimate success or failure (the climax of the story)

E. The resolution into a changed situation, due to the outcome of the climax.

Each writing course will label these steps a little differently, but, in the end, they represent the same 5 simple parts of a plot that we’ve mentioned here. In the chapter coming up, “Developing Characters,” you will see a similar list of steps through which every hero and heroine move as they progress from beginning to end of the story. It is not particularly important that the writer label each individual step based on one writing course or another. What is important is that the writer understand that the natural progression of action or character development is most successful if it follows the pattern we see in real life, which generally does include an arc similar to the one we’ve just described.

SWORDS
CONFLICT

Conflict is always based in the very broad primary concept of Good vs. Evil. However, that “good” and “evil” can wear many faces.

Conflict can be rooted in the relationship and/or rivalry of two individual characters, two families, two nations, two worlds. It can also be rooted in one individual character’s battle with an ideology or a system (for example, a battle to avoid or annihilate a totalitarian government). Some stories create conflict between a character and some force of nature or some element or power outside of the human realm – such as a killer storm, a deserted island, a sorcerer’s curse, etc.

However, conflict can be totally internal as well – within one character himself – possibly between the character’s realization that he needs to overcome some aspect of his nature or personality and the desire on his part to avoid working at overcoming it or letting it go. Conflict can also be internal in the sense that the character is battling an enemy coming against his own mind or body (for example, a deadly disease).

Any or all of these kinds of conflict make for great stories, but you want to be sure that the type of conflict you choose is the best carrier of the story you’re telling so that the story accomplishes exactly what you want it to accomplish.

Also bear in mind that most good stories have more than one conflict going on. The major conflict will decide the resolution of the story, but while it is played out, many of your characters can be experiencing their own minor conflicts that affect how they act and react to the major conflict and how they fit into the climax of the story.

For example, you may have a story in which the main conflict is between law enforcement officers and a huge crime syndicate in their city, which they are trying to bring down. While much of your conversation and action will involve the actual fight between these two elements, some of your individual characters may be battling a sickness, or a divorce, or some kind of character flaw that they can’t seem to overcome. Each of those individual conflicts will have some effect on the job these characters do in resolving the main conflict. Of course, the longer the story, the more possible conflicts you can include.

WHERE TO START

In all fiction, the first three pages of any novel (and the first few paragraphs of any short story) are the author’s only chance to grab the reader’s attention. Once he has that attention, the action or characters must develop quickly enough and realistically enough to hold that attention and keep the pages turning.

Make sure you have your reader securely in your grasp by the end of chapter one. If he isn’t in a hurry to turn the page to chapter two, there’s a moderate chance that he will do so anyway, but most of the time, at that point, he’s usually made his decision about whether or not he’ll finish the book. (A few readers out there force themselves to finish every book they start, whether they like it or not, but you cannot count on that handful of people picking up your book.) And for the short story writer, it’s safe to say that after the first 500 words, the reader has decided whether the story is worth his time.

So how do we capture that reader and hang onto him? Science has the answer. Does that surprise you? Well, believe it or not, two of the world’s greatest physicists have provided the basic truths that generations of writers have used as foundational principles for telling stories. Albert Einstein, after years of scientific work and research came to the conclusion that “nothing happens until something moves.” And another great physicist and mathematician, Isaac Newton, is credited with giving us the basic understanding of the laws of motion. He proved that an object at rest stays at rest unless it receives pressure from an outside force. Then he further proved that an object in motion will remain in motion, going in the same direction, unless acted upon by an outside force.

SOCCAR PLAYER KICKING BALLSo what does that have to do with writing fiction? A LOT: Good plotting puts things into motion quickly and then makes sure they stay in motion, or change direction, or come to a complete stop in such a way that those actions carry the reader along at a satisfying pace. And the gifted story plotter makes sure that every one of those actions and reactions – every motion and counter-motion – has realistic motivation and cause. (And remember: ‘motion,’ as we refer to it here, can be physical, mental, or emotional. However, be careful to avoid getting  your reader bogged down in thoughts or emotions with no physical action to relieve them.)

When the writer begins his story, he needs to have some kind of action taking place in those first few pages – even if his story is mainly character driven. The reader wants to get to know the characters the way he gets to know real-life people – through talking with them, seeing them interacting with other people, and seeing what they do and how they do it. A couple centuries ago, authors got away with giving lengthy descriptions of characters early in their books, and readers put up with it. But in the 21st century, we can’t find those kinds of readers.

All rules have exceptions, of course, and if you are writing a totally character-driven story that requires your reader to be thoroughly acquainted with the thought processes of the main character, you just might be able to begin your story with a monologue of that character’s own thoughts. However, the point we made earlier bears repeating here: keep in mind that too many pages of thoughts with no accompanying actions does get boring for most people.

That being the case, even if you’re focusing on your reader getting to know and understand your main character in the first chapter (or the first page of your short story), you’ll want to let the character say and do some things that will make his nature and personality clear.

So when your reader sees the words “Chapter One,” he will generally expect to see a situation that was at rest before the story started now beginning to move in a specific direction because a character does something or a specific event takes place that starts the ball rolling. Some people like to line up long rows of dominoes and then knock them all down with just the touch of a finger on the first domino in line. Until the outside force – with a motive – does something to the first domino, they all just keep standing there, silent and boring. However, as soon as the outside force causes domino number one to fall against number two – at just the right angle – there’s no stopping the chain reaction. That’s the process of good story telling.

Now, the guy who pushes down that first domino has a motive. He wants to enjoy watching all the other dominoes fall down. In the same way, your first movement in your story –whether it’s by a character, a force of nature, or even a big machine – will have to have a motive. You may not want to disclose that motive in the first chapter, but you, as the writer, have to know what that motive is, and you have to build your story so that when the reader finally does discover the motive later on down the line, the whole story makes sense.

Directly below this article, I have included a sample Plotting Questionnaire that writers can use to help them lay out the important points of their storyline and get a good picture of whether they  have all the bases covered before they start.

It’s interesting to note that in the past few decades, the literary world has seen a slight shift in what readers want when they pick up action (plot-driven) novels. Even these readers now seem to want at least a lead character that they can relate to and develop feelings for. They want to know what makes that guy tick – what’s important to him and why – and what it is that he wants to accomplish. Because, ultimately, it’s what that main character wants to do – save a city – a country – the world – and all the battles he has to fight in order to do it – that makes the story.

So one of the most important things a good story teller can do — even in plot-driven stories —  is develop three-dimensional, true-to-life characters that his readers can relate to. And if the story is intended to be character-driven, then all of the characters need to be carefully developed so that the reader feels so attuned to them that he really cares whether they manage to get what they want by the end of the story. And if the reader really cares, he isn’t going to put that book down until he reads the words “The End.”

In the next lesson, we will discuss in depth the best ways to develop well-rounded characters.


* Releasing the Creative Writer in You, © 2013 by Sandra Pavloff Conner

PLOTTING QUESTIONNAIRE SAMPLE: USE THESE QUESTIONS TO BEGIN PLOTTING YOUR STORY.

PLOT QUESTIONNAIRE

Opening Sentence OR Opening Scene: Write this out to get started. Keep it down to about 1 to 3 sentences. You can always edit or augment it later.

Then write out the answers to the questions below. No need to use complete sentences unless you just want to do so.

Question 1: Does the reader need to know how or why the main character got to the place/position he is in when the story opens? If so, how did he get there?

Question 2: What is the main character’s primary goal or aim in this story? What will he be working toward that will make the reader want to see him succeed?

Question 3: What problems or conflicts will arise to hinder the main character’s carrying out his wishes/goals/plans?

Question 4: Is the main character going to solve the problem(s) and carry out his plans?

Question 5: Will he try some solutions that do not succeed before he finds the right solution? What will he try, and how will they fail.

Question 6: What final solution does he use that is successful?

Question 7: If he is NOT going to solve the problem(s), what will he try to do, and how will he fail?

Question 8: How does the story end?

Question 9: Have I put all necessary characters into place in the answers to the questions above?

Once you have these answers, you’re ready to lay out your outline of scenes in order, from beginning to end. It’s not necessary to use complete sentences or write in paragraph form in that outline. It’s  just for your own personal use: a picture of where you are going and how you plan to get there. The picture and the plan will sometimes change a little — or a lot — as you work through the story, but that’s okay. Ideas grow out of each other, and you may find that your story has a lot more to it than you originally imagined. Just keep double-checking to make sure that what your characters are doing and saying makes sense. Are their actions and reactions connected in a logical, realistic manner?

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Breaking the Mold

BOOKS - darker with symbolSome of the happiest hours of my life have been spent reading great inspirational fiction. But during the past couple of decades, I’ve noticed a trend in that genre that troubles me deeply – not to mention that it takes the fun out of reading inspirational romance and mystery novels. What I’ve been seeing is that nearly every major publishing house now has a mold into which they force every Christian novel – with characters that are carbon copies of scores of characters before them, and with a plot that requires characters to meet within a certain number of pages and to carry out specific types of actions within a certain number of chapters – and worst of all – with themes that carry the reader into the erroneous doctrines of man’s traditions rather than the pure Word of God.

I’ve failed to find one inspirational novel in the past several years that does not promote the erroneous belief that God is behind every single thing that happens in our lives and, therefore, is behind all of the trouble, afflictions, sickness, hurt, and heartache that we undergo. The doctrine that says God deliberately allows (sanctions) those things in our lives in order to teach us something or bring us into a more Christlike character is rampant throughout the Christian bookstore shelves. Now, let’s not beat around the bush: If God deliberately allows those evils when He has the power and the know-how to restrain them it is exactly the same thing as His putting those things in our lives Himself. That teaching goes against everything Jesus Christ taught and lived.

I don’t intend this biographical vignette to be a major Bible lesson, but I will say here that the Word of God is extremely clear for the New Covenant believer that God says He is not in control of all things, and in fact He does not get His own way about a lot of things. He wants all men to be saved, but they will not be. Jesus taught us by His own personal example that God wants all the sick to be healed as well, because He never refused one sick person who came to Him for healing. Moreover, He sent out His disciples to visit the surrounding towns and to heal every sick person in those towns – announcing to them as they did so that they were experiencing the Kingdom of God in that deliverance and healing. He wanted the people in His own hometown to be healed as well, but His Word tell us clearly that He “could not” do any mighty miracles because of their unbelief.

God does not want us to suffer from sickness, deadly storms, earthquakes, accidents, or any number of other horrible destructive forces. But we experience them simply because we live in a cursed world where sin has opened the door to those things, and most of us do not yet have enough of a handle on God’s Word to be living every aspect of our lives according to it. But none of that is God’s plan for us. If it were, He wasted His breath when He breathed out Psalm 91 to the Psalmist and had it included in the canon of the Holy Bible.

So the Christian novels that promote the teaching that it is actually part of God’s will and plan for us to suffer the kinds of things Jesus delivered people from is simply another attempt by man to cop out of our personal responsibility to study and learn God’s Word for ourselves and then to believe it for ourselves. If we can blame God for all the problems we’re facing, we don’t have to take any responsibility for their cause or their cure either one. It’s convenient for the lazy believer, but it is a pack of lies about our God.

His Word also tells us clearly that He has given us His Word, His promises, and His Holy Spirit that will impart to us “all things pertaining to life and godliness” and will create into us the Divine nature of God. The teaching that problems, hardships, and heartaches create the Divine nature of Jesus Christ in us is a direct contradiction of God’s personal Word on the subject. Yet hundreds of inspirational novels that have lined the bookstore shelves for years now keep preaching that demonically inspired theme again and again.

So when the Lord called me to write inspirational novels, He called me to write stories that were true to His Word and that presented Him in the light of what Jesus showed us daily in His time with us on the earth. Jesus said He spoke only what the Father wanted Him to speak and He did only the works that the Father wanted Him to do. So I make every effort in my inspirational novels to show God doing exactly what Jesus did and said. And because He’s still the same “yesterday, today, and forever,” I show Him doing and saying the same things in the everyday lives of ordinary believers in the 21st century.

It’s past time for us to have some inspirational novels that don’t fit the molds. It’s time for stories that show us what it’s really like to live in the 21st century with a God who is just like Jesus Christ.

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A Novel in Progress – New on ‘Debut Writers Journal’

As most of you know, I am the editor of the Debut Writers Journal – an online magazine that showcases the work of students in my creative writing classes at John A. Logan College in Southern Illinois, USA. This term, I will be adding work by at least two or three new writers, and today begins those additions.

train-track-through-field-area-w-titleI’m excited to announce our publication of this first chapter of a brand new novel in progress. Joe Corso is one of the few creative writing students who is working on a  project of this magnitude, and he’s offering us the opportunity to publish several of his first few chapters. It’s a great way for Joe to keep himself challenged, and for readers of the Journal to see the growth and progress of a new novelist in real time.

The Summer of ’32 takes readers on a journey into a time and place in American culture that is gone, but certainly well remembered by many people even in this modern age. Joe enjoys relating the feel of that time in history, but he is also seriously focused on his characters, and their depth and development are what give the story its impact.

Click on this link to read “Chapter One: Death of a Friend”, and if you find yourself caught up in the story and wanting more, be sure and leave a comment for Joe and let him know. Or if you have anything else encouraging to share, please use the “Comment” window and tell us.

Thanks to all of you who take the time to read the work of these new writers and encourage them.

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