`ART WITH BLACK

Two Hillbillies in an Art Museum:

“What is it?”

“It’s an abstract.”

“A what?”

“An abstract. You know – that’s where somebody who thinks he’s an artist takes a canvas and slops a bunch of paint onto it in weird patterns. Then somebody else who thinks he’s an art expert comes along and says it represents that artist’s feelin’s when he was rejected by his lover or it represents man’s inhumanity to man, or somethin’ like that.

“Where’d you learn that?”

“We got Internet up on our mountain now. I been readin’ about all kinds a stuff. I come to this one place on there with all these god-awful weird pictures, so I stopped to find out what they was all about.”

“And it told all about these here abstracts?”

“Right. And purty dern boring stuff if you ask me.”

“Hmmmm. Ain’t there any abstracts that say somethin’ positive?”

“Oh, yeah, there’s a few that are supposed to represent man’s great intelligence or his overpowerin’ love for the world or that kind of thing. But, according to this here report I read, the real value of an abstract is supposed to be that each separate person who sees it will give it his own — a — interpretation I think they called it — based on his own personality and life experiences.”

“Hmmmmmmm. So what do you think this one represents?”

“I have to go to the outhouse, and I’d better get there quick.”

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